Emmett's Valentine's Day
by InTheBreezeOnAnAutumnEve
Summary: It is Valentine's Day in FORKS! Everyone is spending time with their sweetheart, even Charlie! So if Bella and Edward are at the meadow and Alice and Jasper hit the beach, what will Emmett do with his Rose? All human, comedy based on your opinion.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

**Summary: It's Valentine's Day in Forks and everyone is busy on this day of love. If Bella and Edward are going to the Meadow and Alice and Jasper are at the beach, what will Emmett do with his sweetie? Read and find out! All human.**

"Hey Em, what do you want for breakfast?" My little sister, Bella, asked. She just came down the stairs after our dad, Charlie, left for La Push to visit Sue.

"Well Bellsy, I want 5 chocolate pancakes, 7 bacon strips, 4 hash browns, and some scrambled eggs." Bella groaned and made her way to the refrigerator. "It's Valentine's Day, Emmett. Try to keep you shirt clean for Rosalie."

"Ooh! Thanks for reminding me! Can I get pancakes in the shape of a heart? And can you make extra pancakes for Rose? Oh, and how about some-" Before I could get the rest of the sentence out, I got hit in the face with some flour. And she told ME to keep my shirt clean!

"Next time, write a list for me to do when I get down here in the morning or you can make breakfast yourself!" Well then! The nerve of that pimp squeak. "By the way, did you send your Valentine's Day gift to Rosalie yet?"

"No I was going to send it this morning after I write a note on the card. What are you doing with Edward today?"

"First we're going to the meadow and then he's taking me to Port Angeles for lunch. After that, we'll come back here to watch some movies with popcorn. How about you? Anything romantic planned for the Goddess of Emmett?" She smirked.

"That is for me to know and you to never find out."

"Uh huh. Then you can make your own breakfast since Edward is here."

NO! Im losing my cook to someone not as hot as me! "Bell, Bella, Bellsy, my favorite little sister, can you at least cook something for me?" I said in my most begging voice.

"Hmmm. Maybe-" EEP! YAY! "But no! And I'm your only sister so you have no choice but to love me!" She skipped out of the room to answer the door. Don't get me wrong, Edward's a cool guy but I have an instinct to pulverize anyone who hurts Bella.

"Hey Edward." I heard Bella say in her most flirting voice. ~Gag~

"Hey, love. Ready to go yet?"

"Yeah. Just wait a moment." Bella came back into the kitchen and leaned towards the stove. "Are you going to make me breakfast?" I asked excitedly.

"Um, no. . . Just getting my purse Emmett. Enjoy your day with Rosalie. Oh and by the way, Jasper called. He said, and I quote, 'I hope you watch your back today, Grizzface.' To me it sounds like an invitation for a wrestling match. Later Em."

"Bye sis."

**BPOV**

"Later Em."

"Bye sis."

I came out the front door and down the few steps with Edward trailing behind me. I inhaled and exhaled, breathing in the forest scent of dew and pinecones. The sun was shining as I walked to Edward's Volvo. Edward caught up to me and opened the passenger door. He leaned down and kissed me on the lips. We were about to take it to the next level when I heard my brother's child-like voice ring in my ears.

"Bella?! I need help in choosing flowers for Rosalie. Either daisies, tulips, or roses. Which one?"

"Emmett you dickfaced retard! What is the nickname you call Rosalie? Rose, right? So you pick roses!" I half-yelled at Emmett.

"Sowwy Bewwa. I go buy woses for Wosie now." He sulked all the way back to his Jeep and climbed in. I heard the click of his key and the crackling of the radio. "Yeah! My favorite song!"

Emmett had the radio on full volume in the Jeep. He began singing along, off-key of course, to the song.

"Shawty had them apple bottom jeans (jeans)  
Boots with the fur (with the fur)  
The whole club was looking at her  
She hit the floor (she hit the floor)  
Next thing you know  
Shawty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low

"Later BELLA AND EDWARD! I got me some roses to get."

"Bye Emmett." I said in a monotone voice. "Come on Edward, let's go to the meadow."

Edward started to chuckle and got into the driver's seat.

**EM POV**

Wow. I have to say that there are a WHOLE bunch of kinds of roses at the garden center. First I saw white roses and was about to get them but then I remembered, Rosalie hates white except for on a wedding dress. Then I passed by some pink and yellow roses. But when I examined them, I saw that they were a little dead. Upset by the choices of flowers, I walked up to a worker.

"Hey, if you can get me a dozen of the reddest and prettiest roses for my girlfriend, you get $100." Money would get me through this mess! Good thing I borrow from Bella!

"Sir, you can't bribe us for flow-"

"Two fifty." I said as the manager, who heard our entire conversation, walked by.

"SOLD! This way sir." He led me to a room filled with flowers, all healthy and green. "The roses are in the back. Pay on the way out. I'll be on the other side of this door." Then he opened the door and it shut with a click, leaving me alone in the flower room.

I walked down each of the seven aisles and finally found the roses. I picked up a bundle with six roses on them. After a while, I finally picked two of the thirteen perfect rose bundles available. I walked to the front door and gave the manager two fifty.

"Sir this is two dollars and fifty cents."

"I said two fifty. There's two fifty." I grinned as wide as I could and made a break for it. "STOP HIM!" Someone yelled, but I made it out the door before they could catch me. Dad would probably give me a lecture about conning the employees here. Oh well, anything for my Rosie.

I drove home and borrowed one of Bella's numerous vases from Edward. Luckily, Bella also taught me how to care for hours. I put enough water in the vase and cut the bottom of each rose stem for it to fit. Then I placed them all in the vase and added the plant powder thingy in. Finally I reached for the card so that I could-

DAMN IT! I forgot to grab a card to go with the flowers. Maybe I could borrow one of Jasper's. I heard he puts cards alphabetically on a bookshelf. What a dork. I drove to Jasper's street, but parked a few yards away and walked there, bringing the flowers with me. The only way in was to sneak through an open window. It happened to be Rosalie's room so I just took a sniff. Good thing Rosalie was with her parents for just another hour. Walking as soundless as I could, I crept into Jasper's room.

Right on a bookshelf in front of me were the cards. They ranged from Butt-Dance Day to ValeDICKtorian. Example: Christmas, Dinner-dates, Easter, Congratulations You Failed, Graduation, and eventually Valentine's Day. I grabbed one that had a bunch of roses and some carnations. The inside was blank so I grabbed a pen and began to write:

_Happy Valentine's Day Rosalie!_

_I hope you like your dozen of roses because  
I'll love you until the last rose dies._

_Love your big Bear,  
Emmett_

Perfect! I mentally shouted. I added the last rose one because I've read about it on the Internet. "The Top 10 Things to Write in A Valentine Note". _Creak . . . . ! _Wait a minute, what was that?! Uh oh, Rosalie is home with her parents and if I don't get out of here I'll be grounded by the Hales and Dad.

"Rosalie, have you seen your brother?" asked Maybelle, Rosalie's mom, a stout woman with dirty blonde hair.

"I heard he went to the beach with Alice." My angel replied. "Uh, mom. I'm going upstairs, I have homework to do."

"All right sweetheart." NO! I crept slowly back into Rosalie's room and placed the flowers on her desk and jumped out the window. OW DAMMIT! I landed in Maybelle's rose bush. The thorns tore at my shirt when I tried to get out. Finally, after three minutes of scratches and bruises I got free and ran to my car.

Oh, Dad's gonna kill me for ruining the leather interior in the Jeep. But still, ANYTHING FOR MY ROSIE! Now for some songs on the radio.

"You spin my head right round, right round  
When you go down, when you go down down  
You spin my head right round, right round  
When you go down, when you go down down!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


	2. I'm So Sorry

A/N: This is a critical Author's Note. Kenai53503, edward1995, and jayd-n33, thank you for reviewing faithfully to my stories. A big thank you to all of those who have also reviewed to my stories. If you guys don't know I am having problems with the battery cord for my laptop. I got another one but now the problem isn't the new cord. My laptop isn't registering the power for the battery, so it's slowly dying. As I type this, the battery cord is plugged into my laptop to preserve the battery (which is now 46%). I will probably need a new laptop and if that happens all my work will be lost. All of my stories will be on hold until further notice and I am deeply sorry. CURSE CHEAP LAPTOPS!!! The only way to make sure that my stories are finished is to delete them all and start from the beginning. I know that you may never be able to forgive me and I will think about my life on FF until I am able to have a stable laptop. Until I return,

Peace!

Lots of Love,

Michelle 3


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